Sequence: Misery is Company

              “And then I said, ‘What, you want me to sit on it or something?’”

            Laughter roared from the six ponies seated in Twilight’s house.  The purple unicorn looked around and smiled. It had been a rather trying couple of weeks. Even now, despite a smile, Twilight could see a soul-crushing sadness behind Applejack’s eyes. Her mouth turned down a ways as she refocused her attention on Rainbow Dash.

            “Yeah, Spitfire is definitely on the Dash-Train. But who can blame her? A lot of ladies are.”

            Twilight’s breath caught in her chest as she was pretty certain there was a prolonged eye contact between the pegasus and herself. Rainbow Dash smiled as she moved her eyes to the rest of the ponies in the room. Twilight swallowed a lump in her throat; she needed to calm down. There was no time in her life for… whatever this feeling was. And now certainly wasn’t the time to go exploring her mind about her fuzzy-feeling chest. Not that there were any feelings there, of course.

            Twilight felt Rainbow Dash’s eyes burning a hole through her body. Reluctantly, the unicorn raised her eyes to meet Rainbow’s, and found  her magenta gems were trained in Twilight’s direction. Twilight swallowed audibly as she fought to control her pumping heart. It’s not like she had seen those eyes every night before she went to bed for months now. It’s not like every time those eyes light up while reading Daring Do, Twilight’s blood rushed to her heart and forced it to beat with the ferocity of Pinkie Pie on a cupcake binge. It’s not like she was trying desperately to ignore the rush she felt when Rainbow Dash was in the room. It’s not like she worried for her mental health when a certain pegasus invaded her every thought and dream.

            “Isn’t that right, Twilight?” The smile was thick in Rainbow’s voice.

            “I… I beg your pardon?”

            Rainbow Dash’s grin grew wider; Out of the corner of her eyes, Twilight could see Pinkie’s grin growing as well.

            “Ladies. Dash-Train. Right?”

            “Well… I mean, if you say so, Rainbow.”

            “I only say so because we both know-so.”

            Twilight fought with her face to remain stony and cool. She wanted to pretend she didn’t know what Rainbow was talking about. She wanted to pretend that Rainbow was just full of hot air and was just running her mouth again. Sure, Twilight, wanted to believe all of that, but she couldn’t.

            Twilight had to fight to keep her lips pressed together. She wasn’t entirely comfortable with her feelings yet. She didn’t understand being in love with anypony; she had always just been muzzle deep in her studies. It didn’t make much sense to Twilight yet and even if it did, there was certainly no way she was going to tell Rainbow anything in front of the rest of the girls. Twilight didn’t have her usual brace in Applejack. The farm pony was sulked in the corner, not paying attention to anything. The purple unicorn controlled a sigh.

            “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

            Twilight locked eyes with Rainbow Dash, trying to sell her point. She could almost feel Rainbow searching deep into her soul, looking for the real truth. The entire world fell away from Twilight; there was just her and Rainbow Dash. There was no cute couple in the corner. There was no heart-broken earth pony. There was no perfectionist unicorn looking confused. There was no sleeping dragon. There was just her and Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash smiled wider but her eyes faltered for just a fraction of a second. Twilight furrowed her brow and tried to place the look. Before she could, though, Rainbow Dash broke eye contact.

            “Of course you don’t, Twilight.”

            “I really don’t know, Rainbow. What is it we know? We possess knowledge of many things, and I’m sure that some of our knowledge overlaps.”

            “I think we’re going to get going.”

            Twilight snapped her head towards Fluttershy who was, uncharacteristically, speaking up when it mattered most. She smiled softly at the grateful unicorn. Rainbow Dash scowled in Pinkie’s direction.

            “Ah, yes, I should be going as well. Sweetie Belle will be home soon.”

            “Ah recon I should go as well an’ make sure Apple Bloom ain’t annoyin’ Granny Smith.”

            Twilight’s gratefulness faded into worry. With no one around to help her, there would be no stopping Rainbow Dash from continuing her assault on Twilight’s emotions. Not that the present company was making Rainbow Dash any more shy about bringing it up. She was, though, thankful for the time to collect herself. It was hard for Twilight to ignore feelings for somepony when her heart was about to burst from her chest.

            “Oh… I mean, you guys can stay. There’s no need to rush off or anything.”

Pinkie and Dash exchanged a quick glace that did not go unnoticed by Twilight.

“No, that’s okay Twilight. I told Fluttershy that I would make her a super special batch of cupcakes today!”

“You did?”

Pinkie laughed awkwardly as she shoved Fluttershy out the door. Rarity cast a glace back towards Applejack who was shuffling her hooves. AJ looked up as she reached the door and sighed. She met eyes with Rainbow Dash for a second before scowling and turning to Twilight.

            “Ah’ll be around if ya need anythin’.”


            Twilight nodded as the door closed softly. She sighed and turned to see Rainbow Dash had moved closer. Much closer. Twilight’s heart wanted to beat right out of her chest. She forced herself into looking directly into Rainbow Dash’s eyes, despite the fact that she could feel the blood surging to her face in an embarrassed defiance.

            “Come on Twilight. You know you want to kiss me.”

            Twilight’s mouth opened but no sound came out. Her false bravado was fading quickly. Those magenta eyes were bearing into her too heavily. There was no way Twilight could keep denying it.

            “Well…”

            “You don’t have to hide, Twilight. It’s alright.”

            “Rainbow, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Twilight’s voice was surprisingly firm.

            Rainbow Dash’s never let her smirk leave her face. She seemed so confident. She seemed like she was inside of Twilight’s brain. She seemed like… she was a bit scared that Twilight was telling the truth. Twilight looked deep into Rainbow Dash’s eyes. Sure, the pegasus was fully aware of how talented and sought after she was. And she was pretty vocal about it. But Twilight learned long ago that the louder Rainbow talked, the less she believed.

            “Oh, come on Twilight. We all know you want to board the Dash-Train.”

            “Rainbow!”

            “I’m just saying, Twilight. You haven’t exactly told me I’m wrong.”

            “And I’m just saying, Rainbow, that I don’t NEED to tell you anything. ”

            Rainbow Dash leaned in close to Twilight, barely inches from her face. Twilight felt her breath catch in her throat. Every inch of her body was tingling. She could feel Rainbow’s breath on her neck. This was exactly what she wanted. Nothing about this was wrong; it was all so very right. So then why was Twilight so adamant about telling Rainbow no?

            “Tell me you don’t want to kiss me, Twilight.” Dash whispered.

            Twilight swallowed hard, trying to keep her emotions in check. The one she was having the most problems with was the seemingly primitive instinct to tackle Rainbow Dash to the ground and do Celestia knows what.Twilight felt a guilty shiver run up her spine. She could hear the smile in Rainbow Dash’s voice. Every inch of her being was fighting to be released. Twilight fought to keep her face even. This was what she wanted, she kept repeating to herself. But she couldn’t have it. She had her studies. She had… no idea what she was doing. The idea of telling Rainbow Dash how she felt was terrifying. What if this was just a game? What if Rainbow Dash didn’t care about Twilight at all? What if she screwed everything up and then everything was ruined forever? Twilight couldn’t justify taking that chance.

            “You just think you know everything.” Twilight breathed.

            “Of course. You haven’t told me I’m wrong.”

            “Why does it matter?”

            “Because  I can just tell.”

            Twilight grimaced as Rainbow Dash almost nuzzled Twilight’s muzzle.

            “You really don’t think I believe you, do you?”

            Twilight swallowed. She kept her eyes trained on the floor but stole a look at Rainbow’s face. Her ears were back and her brow was furrowed. She was looking for a bone, any bone. Twilight wasn’t giving her one.

            “There’s nothing to not believe.” Twilight could feel her voice wavering.

            “I know you want to kiss me.”

            “You couldn’t possibly know that.”

            “Oh?”

            Rainbow Dash’s tone was accusatory. If Twilight didn’t find an out soon, she was going to be caught red hooved.  This was all going too quickly. Twilight combed her mind for anything at all that would get her out of this conversation. She could handle never fully knowing how Rainbow Dash felt. It would be easy to kill the pain with books. But if something happened, if she found out that Rainbow DID like her and then it all spiraled out of control then Twilight would find no solace again. Of this she was sure.

            “Why are you so confident about something that you don’t even know is true?”

            “Because I know you want to. And you haven’t said that you don’t want to kiss me.”

            Twilight was surprised when she felt her face heat again. She was fairly certain that she had been beet red the entire time. She gritted her teeth.

            “Does it really matter to you, Rainbow? I thought you were with Spitfire anyway.”

            A cold silence filled the room. Twilight felt a feeling of… jealousy? Hatred? Twilight wasn’t sure if it was directed at herself or Spitfire. The unicorn was embarrassed at her outburst, but not surprised by it. Her emotions had reached a boiling point. And if she wanted to make sure she kept her friendship intact, it was much easier to just suppress any feelings that she may have. But if this was supposed to be the easy route, why did she feel like she just let herself down? Why did her chest feel empty? Why did she just want to lay down and cry?

            Rainbow Dash bit her lip and stared at her hooves.  There was that emptiness in her eyes again. Rainbow’s confidence was completely gone. Her ego had been completely deflated.

            “I… well, I mean, I’m not actually with Spitfire.”

            Twilight cringed. There was definitely a hurt edge to her words. Was it really all just in her ego? Of course it was, this was Rainbow Dash. Either way, Twilight couldn’t take it back. Rainbow would be happier with someone like Spitfire anyway, right? Twilight ignored the nagging feeling in her chest.

            “Well, don’t you want to be?”

            “I… guess.”

            “Then go to her, Rainbow. After all, she is on the Dash-Train.”

            Twilight poked Rainbow in the ribs. The two still sat close to each other, mere inches away from touching. They looked deep into each other’s eyes as the silence grew thicker above them. Rainbow Dash lifted one corner of her mouth into a smirk. Twilight let go of a breath she didn’t know she was holding.

            “Yeah I… guess she is.”

            “Go on, Rainbow. I bet if you asked her now, she’d go to dinner with you tonight.”

            “Heh I… yeah. Sure. I should… go then.”

            Rainbow Dash awkwardly and slowly got up. Twilight bowed her head. The pegasus opened the door and paused, looking back. She smirked again but it didn’t touch her eyes. It was an empty motion. The door once again quietly shut. Twilight fell over and inhaled loudly. The tears running down her face were hot and angry. She covered her head with her hooves and sobbed until she heard the front door open again. Twilight immediately pushed herself up and away from the door. There was no way she was going to let anyone see her like this. The unicorn tried to choke out a question, but found only sad sobs in her throat. Her unspoken question was answered quickly, though, as a tan hoof draped itself over Twilight’s shoulder.

            Applejack had taken her hat off and rested it on the floor. The two looked at each other, understanding everything without a word. Twilight couldn’t help herself. She buried her face into AJ’s neck and sobbed. Every ounce of jealousy and hatred fell out in her tears. After a long moment, she felt a tear fall on the top of her head. Twilight hugged AJ tighter. The unicorn had always been appreciative of the farm pony, but she had never been more grateful of her presence than right then.