Truth: Part Thirteen -Edited

"Vinyl? Are you awake?"

A muffled, sleepy grunt came from under a dark purple comforter.

"Vinyl? Are you up?"

The comforter groaned again. The longer grunt had anger laced within it's lack of syllables.

"You sound awake."

"Why ASK me if I'm awake if I look like I'm sleeping still?" Vinyl spat into her pillow. She was unsure if her irritation was at Lyra or her sudden lack of being asleep. She assumed the former.

"Well, you could have had your eyes closed but been awake."

"Or... or I could have been SLEEPING." Vinyl sighed and pulled the blankets off of her head. "What do you want, Lyra?"

"Well, I want to talk."

As Vinyl pushed herself to an upright position, she noticed her mane was matching its electric color with its style. She shook her head and almost perfectly, her mane sunk down in a classic Vinyl 'do.  The DJ cast a hard glare towards Lyra but felt the ice melt off of her heart a bit as she took in the sight. A layer of guilt washed over her as she saw a nervous look planted on Lyra's face. Her golden eyes were scared and sad as if she was dreading this conversation, but in a different way than Vinyl. As much as she wanted to hate Lyra, she couldn't fully. At least not while she looked so pathetic. After all, Lyra obviously still cared about Vinyl and wanted to save their friendship. A friendship that Vinyl herself wanted to save, so she thought at least.

"Alright. About what?" Vinyl tried to act like she cared.

"You just seem so off lately. What's going on in your life?"

It was all Vinyl could do to not groan and facehoof. It was WAY too early in the afternoon for this. She locked eyes with Lyra's, but found the mint pony staring past her. All of the anger she had built up was falling to the wayside at a rapid pace. Every bitter feeling she felt was escaping her. She couldn't bring to the surface anything she had wanted to confront Lyra on. Vinyl was accustomed to seeing her ex so vulnerable, it almost hurt her to see. Or maybe that was just her being too tired to care. Or maybe, just maybe, it was easier to be mad at Lyra when she wasn't around. Though, that's sort of the way that Vinyl preferred it nowadays.

"I'm not off, I'm just... preoccupied. You know what's going on in my life. Octy's goin' on in my life. She makes me happy and I like being around her."

"And why haven't you told me?"

"Don't... just, please, don't. I did tell you. I even let you guys hang out for a bit."

Lyra ignored the last sentence. "You go out of your way to avoid me."

"No I don't. I - "

"Yes you do. You only bring her here when Bon Bon and I are at my house. If we're here, you go to her house or that stupid music store."

Vinyl saw bitterness flash across Lyra's otherwise stone-like face. She could feel the guilt that was consuming her stop cold and give way to the usual anger she felt towards Lyra.

"Now just a second! That's not tru-"

"It's like you don't want me to see you and her together."

Vinyl's entire face twitched in irritation. She tried to hide her flared nostrils by breathing deeply, but it didn't get rid of the ire that was slowly glowing inside her. She tried her best to keep calm. The guilt that she was feeling before had started to retreat. The hatred within her was starting to break through as she realized something she had refused to truly believe before then. This wasn't the pony that was her best friend for years; this was somepony else entirely.

"I don't TRY to keep her away from you. I just hate how you act around other mares I'm interested in." Vinyl's voice was rising with every syllable she spoke.

"Wh... What?! What does that mean? What have I ever done?" Lyra's pathetic charade was replaced by a wild glare as she meet Vinyl's eyes for the first time.

"Remember the shopping trip? You were totally uncool to Octavia when we went into town. I don't care if you're rude to me, but to someone you just met? Come on, Lyra."

"You were ignoring me, Vinyl! I was frustrated because you wouldn't even give me thirty seconds!"

"We were in the middle of a conversation. I'm sorry I didn't drop everything and pay every second of my attention to you for the first time since before we met. Besides just that, every time I so much as mention her, you get that weird murdery twitch in your eyes. When she's around, you act like a total foal, and I swear I saw you try to set her on fire with your mind. You're forgetting that I can read you as well as you can read me."

"So, what, you think I'm jealous?"

Vinyl felt her last twig of patience snap. "Oh for crying out loud. Yes, alright? I do think you play the jealous ex role pretty well and I personally just don't want to deal with it anymore. You're not fun when you're like this. You're not the Lyra that I met all those years ago and hung out with. You keep saying that I'm different, that I'm acting weird. But it's YOU. I'm just being me. Ever since we broke up -"

"You know I don't like to talk about that." Lyra said softly, looking away.

"Yeah, I've noticed." Vinyl growled through clenched teeth. "You never want to talk about it. Have you even told Bon Bon yet?" She wasn't about to fall for her guilt-trip twice in one day.

Lyra was silent for a long moment. "I don't see what that has to do with anything."

"You know what, it has nothing to do with anything. Forget it. You're good at forgetting stuff like that."

Vinyl hated herself for the angry that freely controlled her thoughts and actions. But for every second she hated herself, she hated Lyra more. It's not that she wanted Lyra to come crawling back to her with empty apologies and fake 'I love you's; she just wanted some recognition that they had something special once. She wanted the knowledge that she wasn't just some random roadside stop on the train of Lyra's attention-seeking tour. She wanted to feel like she wasn't lied to when they were together. But she was never sure that any of it was real, if anything she said was ever true. Vinyl shook her head. She wasn't sure what it mattered to her anymore. Lyra kept her eyes at the floor, almost looking ashamed.

"Look, I've got to go. I'm sorry you think I'm the worst pony ever. I guess I'll see you later or something."

Vinyl silently watched as Lyra slowly turned around and walked out of the room. She knew that she was supposed to stop her. She knew that Lyra was fully enforcing the guilt card, and wanted Vinyl to run to her and apologize. She felt the guilt tear at the edges of her heart and lash out at her for not saying a word as the mare that she used to hold so dear walked away. She knew all this, but yet, she couldn't force the empty words and promises of a brighter friendship out of her mouth. Vinyl found the near inaudibility of the front door clicking shut almost metaphoric of a friendship silently slinking away into the night. Or day. Whichever it was. Vinyl wasn't entirely sure.

She laid back down in her bed and stared up at the ceiling of her room. Emotions and thoughts swirled around her head, yet she couldn't grab hold of one thought over another. She was angry, guilty, confused, irritated, but yet liberated. She realized that she had been unnecessarily holding onto Lyra for years, forcing herself to continue loving her because she had no choice. Lyra decided everything, and whether or not the lyrist's tyrannical iron fist on Vinyl's life was intentional or not didn't matter. But finally, Vinyl could get out of bed and not fully care about Lyra and how she felt. About how Lyra would react to what she was doing. Sure, she wanted to keep the peace, but she also had Octavia. The seemingly one pony in the entire world that let her be what she truly was; Vinyl Scratch, the baddest DJ in all of Equestria. The coolest mare anypony knew. The drinker, the social smoker when she was drunk, and the one pony who couldn't get that stupid Marely Cyrus song out of her head.

Vinyl couldn't help but smirk. She pushed herself out of bed and headed to take a shower, knowing that tonight, or at least right now, she was empowered enough to lay it all on the line for Octavia. It was time.

–----

"I need a drink. A lot of them. Now."

Vinyl scrunched her face as Octavia pushed past her, darting right for the fridge.

"Where's the fire, Octy?"

"I just... I just need a drink."

Vinyl wedged herself in between the Octavia and the cupboard with the glasses.  She raised an eyebrow at the gray earth pony. There was a fire burning in those lavender eyes that Vinyl had never seen before. It was angry but it was hiding... something.

"Spill it."

"Only if I drink."

Octavia's voice was as even as it normally was, but there was a hard edge gently lacing each of her words. Vinyl stepped to the side, worry creasing her forehead.

"C'mon Octy. What's up?"

Octavia sighed and poured two shots, handing one to Vinyl. The two glasses clanked and were gone in an instant.

"Well, it started when I went to go see Frederic. We were just going to hang out for a bit and go shopping for that present, maybe get some lunch or something. Then we ran into Beauty Bass... She may have mentioned Frederic's intentions of asking out some mare. Somepony he met that works at his sister's school."

"I... I'm sorry to hear that."

All the air got sucked out of Vinyl's lungs. Vinyl felt like somepony just punched her in the chest, broke her equipment, and spit on her mom right in front of her She looked towards the floor, looking for her shattered heart. Octavia was clearly livid with Beauty Bass and therefore distracted from the less-than-okay pony in front of her.

"It's not just that, though. Beauty Bass wouldn't let it go. It's all she wanted to talk about."

"Well, does she know?"

"Yes. She is fully aware of my feelings towards Frederic and I'm sure she was just excited for him, but even still. It was just... I don't know. It got to me. And it probably shouldn't because I know that Frederic is just a thing. He's not interested. I'll never actually be with him. But still."

Octavia's nostrils flared as they always did when she was upset and ranting. For a split second Vinyl noted how adorable she looked. Then she felt another pang roll through her chest, almost reducing her to frustrated tears. The white unicorn did what she did best, though, and tucked it all away to cry over later.

"Aw man, I'm sorry Octy. That's not cool. But don't be so hard on yourself. You don't know what will happen between you two."

"No, it's alright Vinyl. I know that I won't actually be with him. I'm not being self-hating, just honest. He's not interested. End of story. But that doesn't excuse Beauty Bass for being a... well, never mind exactly that."

Vinyl wasn't aware that Octavia could be as livid as she was. There was a thick silence in the room for a minute until Vinyl's mouth betrayed her.

"Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm stuck in a similar situation."

Wait, what did you just say?

Octavia cocked her head to the side. "Oh?"

Crap.

Vinyl grimaced, not sure how she would get herself out of this one.

"Yeah, well. I know all about the whole... wanting someone that you're pretty sure you'll never be with. It's not fun. I'm sorry Octy."

Octavia stared at Vinyl, contemplating. "Yeah, well, it's not fun. At least we have each other, right?"

Vinyl and Octavia locked eyes for a long moment, trying to read exactly what the other was thinking. Vinyl sighed and looked away, grabbing the shot glasses. Octavia was clearly in love with Frederic, and there was nothing she could do about it. She stood no chance against him. It's not like Octavia liked mares or anything anyway. Trying to pretend she didn't want to burst into tears, Vinyl poured two more shots and raised her glass.

"Here's to pining."

"Hear, hear!" Octavia exclaimed.

****

"Vinyl, it's coooooooooooooold."

Ten shots and two drinks later, Vinyl and Octavia were in no condition to do much of anything. Vinyl giggled drunklenly at Octavia, who outright refused to walk on the cold, wet grass. The temperature dipped far below the freezing point, but the warmth of the alcohol made Vinyl brave enough to want to go see the meteor shower yet.

"VINYL. How are we supposed to leave?! My hooves will get all wet and cold and then I'll be so sad."

Octavia pouted at Vinyl, her lavender eyes opened wide for effect. Vinyl grinned, the slightly more sober of the two and reduced the space between herself and her crush.

"One of these days, that's not going to work on me, you know." Vinyl said as she hoisted Octavia onto her back, reveling in the extreme closeness of the two.

"I'll believe that when you prove it." Octavia said, smugly.

"You can always walk on the grass yourself."

"Noooo! It's cold."

Octavia straddled Vinyl's back and drunkenly leaned forward, wrapping her forehooves around Vinyl's neck and resting her chin on the top of Vinyl's wild blue mane. The DJ loved the closeness, she loved the touching and the way it felt so natural for the two to be so close. Her heart was jittery from the alcohol. She knew that she was still a bit too drunk to be safely out in public, but she didn't really care. The bitter cold night sobered her up fairly well, even if it didn't have quite the same effect on her drunken rider.

So, she's in love with Frederic. So much so that she got all schnookered up because he was going to ask another mare out, yet here she is on MY back, whispering drunken comments into MY ear and going to watch a meteor shower with ME...

WHAT.

"So where we going to see the show?"

"Hmm, I'm not sure yet. I'm pretty much just going towards the darkest part of town I know so we don't have to deal with any stray lights."

"Dark is good. Warm is good. Where are the blankets?"

"They're in the bag that's under you. Don't worry, I remembered. You know... It's pretty cold. I might have to cuddle rape you to stay warm."

Vinyl could feel the extra pressure from the chin on the top of her head, presumably from the large grin that just stretched across Octavia's face. Vinyl felt her face heat up, damning the alcohol for making her so bold.

"Body heat and all that..." Vinyl muttered. "Ah, yes, here we are." She added quickly, changing the subject.

Vinyl walked down a dark, seemingly neglected country path. There were hills every which way she turned, making it a good place to find a vantage point. She settled near an old building for a bit of cover. Octavia reluctantly got off of Vinyl's back so she could set up the blanket to protect them from the cold grass. Octavia sat on the blanket and looked up at Vinyl, who's face was still matching her eyes in color. Octavia rested her head on her own shoulder, making Vinyl wonder if she was going to melt from being so adorable.

"Well? I'm not going to stay warm on my own, you know."

"Huh? Oh! Yes. Right then."

Vinyl laid down on her back, stretching one forehoof awkwardly across Octavia's shoulders. Her position was a little uncomfortable, but there was no way she was going to give it up for anything in the entire world. The silence between them took over, letting Vinyl escape into her thoughts. She wondered if she was really going to go through with it and tell Octavia how she felt. It was a rather brash decision on her part. It wasn't like she stood a chance at all, or that Octavia even cared.

"So who's this mare?"

Vinyl's blood ran cold.

"Huh buh guh wha?"

"Tell me more about her. You've only just mentioned her. Is she the one you're thinking about when you get that faraway look in your eyes? Or... your glasses. Is it Lyra?" Octavia kept her eyes on the sky.

"No, Celestia no it's not Lyra. We actually got in a fight today."

"Oh! There's a meteor!" Octavia said, thrusting a hoof towards the sky. "About what?"

"She was just being all... her. I don't know. She tried to guilt me into feeling bad about how our friendship is dying and about how I never bring you around and I'm shutting her out and whatnot. I got angry. It was kind of ridiculous. All before I could properly wake up too!"

Octavia laughed. "So I'm the problem again, am I?"

"Yeah, I don't know. I just don't know about her. She gets all jealous like she wants something from me, but then whenever I mention that we dated for like, two years or whatever, she pretends it didn't happen. I'm pretty sure it's so repressed that not even Bon Bon knows. Not like I care a whole lot anymore. I used to. But... you know, I'm just kind of over it."

"Good. Lyra hasn't exactly proven to me that she's worth your friendship. Besides, you've got this new mare, right?"

Damnit!

"Heh, takes more than that to derail you, huh?"

"Yes. Now what is she like? I want to know before you end up with a Lyra."

Octavia turned to look at Vinyl, her eyes laced with curiosity. Vinyl wondered why exactly she cared so much.

"Well... she's really smart and she's funny. And she's feisty and witty. And she's absolutely gorgeous. She's the kind of mare I just want to be around, you know? She makes me happy... She lets me be me. Not to mention her eyes. They're amazing."

Vinyl's face was as hot as the sun. It was weird telling Octavia what she liked about her, without actually telling Octavia what she liked about her. Octy's eyes narrowed for a second but a small smile crossed her lips. She refocused her attention on the stars above.

"Well that's good."

Silence fell over the two again. Vinyl's heart was beating in her throat. Was she really going to go through with this? Could she really face the rejection of this pony?  The mare that's allowed her to feel feelings again after being apathetic to life for so long?

Do it... do it... do it... do it...

Her stomach turned a bit from her nerves but she felt oddly calm at the same time. She couldn't quite explain it, but she knew that it was now or never. Another meteor shot across the sky, this time both ponies pointing it out. They looked at each other and smiled. Vinyl's heart was beating as if she had just finished running a marathon. She held Octavia's gaze for what seemed like eternity. She had such a hard time reading Octavia in that moment. There was something behind her eyes that she couldn't quite get at. She seemed content, more so than the situation immediately called for. There was a smirk permanently plastered on her face, one that Vinyl couldn't make heads or tails of. Was she happy that she was star gazing or was there something else? Octavia's body language gave nothing away. She laid peacefully over Vinyl's arm neither moving towards or away from the unicorn.

She could have screamed. Vinyl just wanted a clue, just one tiny clue as to what she was really thinking. Could there really be something more between them? Was Octavia's almost amused tone, one that was so angry over Frederic earlier, a sign that she herself had hidden feelings? Was there another reason that Octavia stayed at Vinyl's every night, in her bed? Vinyl tried to suffocate her thoughts; she knew that there was nothing between them. At least, that's what she forced herself to know. When Octavia turned her head back to the sky, breaking her gaze into the DJ's eyes, Vinyl drew a deep breath and jumped in hooves first.

"You know her." She barely whispered.

"Do I now?"

"Y-yes. Yes you do."

"Hmm."

Octavia's eyes briefly flickered to Vinyl's face before flashing back towards the sky. A light bulb went off in Vinyl's mind. Everything suddenly made sense. The concert, the change of plans, the resting of her head on Vinyl's shoulder and the sharing the bed... It was all coming together more clearly than Vinyl could have ever imagined.

"I have a question."

"Anything, Vinyl." Octavia said with a careful smile.

"Well, it's not a question but... I think that you... you know more than I thought you knew and I think right now you know exactly what I'm trying to get you to know. You know?"

Octavia laughed. "I know nothing."

That was all the proof she needed. Octavia knew how Vinyl felt.

"Yes huh! I know you know!"

"I know nothing. I would never assume that I know anything."

I've never met a mare that made me love her despite being so OH MY CELESTIA WHAT DID I JUST SAY I DON'T LOVE HER SHE'S JUST A CRUSH.

Again, the two remained silent, watching the meteor shower slowly push on in the black canopy above them. The moon was nowhere to be seen, just brilliant stars and meteors. Vinyl couldn't figure out why Octavia was playing innocent when she clearly knew exactly what was going on. Still, the gray pony remained nearly impossible to read. Her eyes gave away that she probably knew the truth, but there was still... something. Vinyl wasn't sure what it was, but she needed desperately to find out.

"When are you going to admit that you know?" Vinyl asked, seriously.

"Know what? I don't assume things." Octavia's face stretched into a brilliant smile.

"ARG! Octy..."

"Yes Vina?"

"You... I just.. whajit... mares."

"And you are one of them."

"Can't prove that."

"Oh? So you're a stallion?"

"Oh hush you."  Vinyl was almost enjoying being frustrated.

Octavia giggled as Vinyl's nerves lurched up into her esophagus. She knew Octavia knew, especially now that she seemed to be toying with her a bit. There was no possible way that she didn't know. The knowledge made it a little easier to just admit the truth.

"... You. It's you."

"What's me?" Octavia questioned through her smile.

"You are so frustrating."

"You love it."

"OctaviaIthinkIlikeyou." Vinyl blurted out.

Octavia was silent for a long time, staring up at the stars. The smile was gone from her face and she seemed to be focusing quite intently on the stars above. She didn't look angry or upset and she still hadn't moved an inch one way or another. Even though Vinyl knew that Octavia had known, her stomach still continued to turn in the eons that it seemed to take Octavia to respond. Her statuesque face made it impossible for Vinyl to expect anything but the worst possible outcome.

"Was that so hard?" Octavia whispered.

"You knew, didn't you?"

"I had a hunch, but I didn't want to just assume that since you liked other mares that you liked me. That's just ignorant. Besides, you're in love with Lyra."

"Is that what you told yourself?"

"Yeah. Well, that and you told me. I figured you loved Lyra and it's silly of me to think that you'd like me."

"Well... I do."

Now that it was out in the open, it was incredibly easy to talk about. Vinyl's face no longer felt like she was going to get a sunburn. She just wished her arm would stop falling asleep so she could keep it tucked nicely under Octavia's head. Defeated, she pulled it down and cuddled in closer to Octavia, after turning on her side. Octavia turned her head towards Vinyl.

"This meteor shower is less meteor and more stars."

"Still, though, I do enjoy star gazing."

"Yeah, me too."

"... Vinyl?"

"Yeah Octy?"

Octavia kept her eyes trained on her hoofs, which were picking at each other. She seemed unsure of herself, yet she didn't seem uncomfortable. She took a second to gather her words.

"I don't know what any of this means, but I do know that I don't want to hurt you. You've become pretty important to me. That's the last thing I'd ever want to do."

Vinyl couldn't help but smile. "It's alright. I know my place in your life and I'm pretty content with it. I just don't want things to change."

Octavia looked Vinyl in the eyes again. Vinyl wasn't sure why she was so happy. Maybe it was that she finally told Octavia mostly how she felt. Maybe it was that Octavia seemed to respond as warmly as she possibly could have. Or maybe it was whatever Octavia had hidden deep within her mind that Vinyl was holding onto. Maybe whatever Octavia was hiding was where Vinyl was getting her hope from.

Or... I'm kinda one of those... likes pain people. Except I do it to myself. And it's emotional. Oh well! I still won!

"They won't, Vinyl, they won't. I can't promise you much, and to be completely honest, my head is spinning right now. Maybe from the alcohol, maybe from the cold... maybe from you. I'm not sure. But I do know that no matter what, we're friends until the end."

"I can live with that. Now let's go home, I'm freezing."

"Hear, hear."

Octavia and Vinyl packed their blankets up and walked home, side by side. Vinyl still wasn't sure why, but she was almost as happy as she would have been if Octavia would have professed her undying and totally not made up feelings for the DJ. Vinyl noted, as they walked towards the big, blue house, how Octavia's body seemed to lean ever so slightly her way. They smiled at each other, almost sheepishly. Vinyl looked up and thanked the stars for a night that would stay fresh in her mind for a long time.